I cannot sleep.
I’m thinking of writing a poem but I don’t know how to write a decent one. A friend told me a few hours ago to be mindful of enjambments and breathe. That I need to know the science of metaphors that I will use. And that just because they are good to listen to, it does not guarantee that it will be a good poem. I don’t even know what those enjambment things are so how can I be mindful of them. And who even gave the meaning to the word metaphor? Who decided to say that metaphor is the word to describe an object or idea used as a symbol of something else? Ah! I don’t want to hurt my brain. But I’ll research about it later today. About enjambments I mean. And maybe metaphors as well.
But not now. Because I happened to stare at my bedside window and through the sheer material of my curtain, I could actually make out a few bright stars. Strange. The sky must be really clear right now. Pulling the curtain to the side, I put my eyeglasses on and opened my window. The cool breeze eagerly lapped around my skin and my eyes automatically slid shut. It was soothing. I forced my eyes to open so I could gaze towards the vast darkness that is the midnight sky. It is indeed a very clear sky. Apparently the bright stars I saw were Rigel, Betelgeuse and Bellatrix. I had a classmate before named Rigel. I think he’s in Japan now. When I mentioned that his name was from a star in the Orion constellation he was amazed at how I knew it. I don’t even know why I know that. I really don’t. My brain just happened to like storing information I randomly heard or read but don’t really need in my everyday life. I wonder though why our brains keep all these memories, all these data, all these information when the moment we die it will all just die with us. What is the point? Will knowing about the name of the stars in Orion the Hunter help me find a job? Will easily pointing out Cassiopeia in the sky help ease my nerves when I’m in a new situation? Speaking of Cassiopeia. I know it’s almost Christmas time when Cassiopeia shows up in the northern part of the sky. I mean I know it’s always there but it gets extra vibrant during this season. I will always try to find it when I’m walking at three in the morning on my way to Misa De Gallo back in 2008-2013. I also remember seeing a falling star which shot across Cassiopeia one early morning of December 2008. It was so quick and instead of making a wish I just excitedly told my friends that I saw one. I wonder how Cassiopeia feels by hanging upside down in the sky for so long. She must be having really terrible headaches. Ah! My head is aching. What is the point of knowing these things anyway? I do not understand why we have to have these recollection of things that actually has no use to us.
It’s now 2:18 AM. I just want to sleep.
Written on the wee hours of September 27. Artwork used as featured image made on the morning of September 28.